cowboy crosstalk shenanigans

[lifeban]

[they've won! good job everyone! 10/10 performance! dan heng didn't even blow his once-in-a-lifetime bootycall button this time around, thanks to boothill's quick interference.

there was celebrating on the Express, but one way or another, the party wound up in the VIP lounge of the hotel again, where dan heng accidentally took a swig of boothill's drink and became Fantastically Drunk.

in fact, at this moment he's sulkily leaning into boothill's side, all his aloof and cool energy utterly abandoned.]

Comments

[motherfudger]

[He knows how it goes with Xianzhou folks, that Dan Heng's not as young as he looks, but how is he supposed to refrain from teasing a guy who can't hold his liquor?

Kinda fun to see this side of the Nameless too.]

Hey kid, next time I'll order you a regular juice. Seems you ain't yet ready for the strong stuff.

[lifeban]

[deadass pouts.]

I ordered a regular juice this time...

[motherfudger]

[Oh my gosh darn look at that.]

S'pose you could always try working on building up a tolerance. How much'a my drink did you even have?

[lifeban]

[furrowing his brow in thought.]

Like... two swallows?

[he had been taking a hard drink of his juice to cope with something boothill said, but their glasses...]

I don't wanna build a tolerance.

[motherfudger]

Two...

[His expression does a journey of surprised, horrified, and acceptance.]

Nevermind. Your case is hopeless.

[He flags the bartender.]

A tall glass of water for my compadre here. Then we're calling it a night.

[lifeban]

[shoving his face into boothill's (not particularly soft) shoulder, grumbling.]

S'not my fault you drink rocket fuel... I don't like altered- states of mind.

[haltingly like he's reaching for actual phrasing.]

[motherfudger]

[At least his shoulder has some padding, as one of the few parts of him actually covered by fabric. He mentally reminds himself "Down boy" and wraps an arm around Dan Heng's back to steady him.]

Face up partner, down your Adam's Ale and I'll help you back to the barn. You can tell me all about it.

[He lifts the water glass for Dan Heng.]

[lifeban]

Ale?

[in befuddlement, lifting his head.

but he gets it after a moment, just slower than he would have otherwise.]

Oh.

[leaning in to drink from the glass just. with it in boothill's hand.]

[motherfudger]

[Well. Okay. We're doing that. He helps Dan Heng get some water in him before setting it down.]

Trust you don't mind if we settle up later, barkeep. Got my hands full you see.

[And he's lifting Dan Heng into a princess carry. ]

[lifeban]

[



O//////O]

[motherfudger]

[Wow look at that blush. Shame the guy's three sheets to the wind.]

So what've you got against altered states of mind?

[Just making conversation while carrying him to the complimentary hotel room that finally got sorted. Closer than the express.]

[lifeban]

[sobers. metaphorically.]

I can't protect myself like that.

[motherfudger]

Well fudge, thought that you Nameless all had each other's backs. What's the story?

[lifeban]

We do. But I can't... protect them, like that, either.

[tucking his head against boothill's chest.]

I've only been a Nameless for a little while.

[citation needed, hashtag xianzhou folks]

What kind of guard am I if I can't protect them from my past?

[motherfudger]

Always on duty? Now if that don't sound fudging tiring. You ever take breaks?

[lifeban]

I stayed off planet for Penacony. Look what happened.

[bro being on standby isn't a Break and also what the fuck]

[motherfudger]

[Yeah]

What the fudge does that mean.

[lifeban]

...What do you mean, what does it mean?

[motherfudger]

That ain't no break I've heard of. Plus, what's with you thinking the mess had to do with you standing watch by the campfire?

[lifeban]

I could have been more help if I was there.

[just ignoring the first bit entirely.

also ignoring that being off planet is why he could help at all BUT, drunk.]

[motherfudger]

That so? Don't seem quite right.

[Don't argue with the drunk guy. He'll kick open the door.]

[lifeban]

[startles in his arms at the abrupt bang]

[motherfudger]

Whoa there, you really don't relax. I got ya. No reason to get tense.

[Kicking the door closed.]

[lifeban]

[twitches again, but shoves his head harder into boothill's chest.]

S'just. Loud.

[motherfudger]

Boy you ever relaxed in... well however many years you've been around?

[Walking to one of the couches to set him down.]